Monday, December 12, 2016

Dr. Grumpy's gift guide

Did a loved one pass this year, leaving you with an urn above the fireplace? That seems so trite. There has to be something better to aspire to for all eternity.

How about reincarnating them as a coffee mug?


"Auntie Em? Is that you?"


For only a few hundred bucks this place will convert the dearly departed into a serving bowl, or candle holder, or jewelry, or dinnerware... The possibilities are endless!

Think of the looks you'll get when you reach into a cabinet and say "I'm taking grandma out for coffee" (and laugh maniacally) or ask a guest "can you pass Aunt Zelda's mashed potatoes?"

No word on the site if they make dental implants or toilets, but it never hurts to ask.

20 comments:

Unknown said...

Mix them with concrete, or plaster, and the possibilities are endless.

Nurse Lilly said...

Do they make sex toys?

Anonymous said...

How about a little idol that you can worship?

Steph B said...

That's sick.

Kai said...

Oh. Oh dear.

Nurse Lilly - there is actually a sex toy you can put some of your deceased loved one's ashes in...

Yoko Drāno said...

"And that, my child, is how they make Hummel figurines like the ones on your shelf. Nighty-night."

Anonymous said...

Christmas tree ornaments?

Anonymous said...

Dreidels?

Ivan Ilyich said...

I was thinking a coffee mug might be appropriate for my cremains, but it costs more than the cemetery plot I'm considering.

Packer said...

Only to be sold at a garage sale for 50 cents some 20 years in the future.

Whatever happened to spreading your ashes on Nantucket Sound or some other pretty spot.

bobbie said...

Yoko D ~ I will never look at all my Hummel's the same way again!

Mike said...

If you break the coffee mug (or whatever) do you have to give the pieces a dignified burial in the yard? I'd feel guilty about throwing shards of grandpa in the trash.

Unknown said...

I friend posted a picture on Facebook of her baby chewing on an necklace with the caption "It's so cute how she loves to chew on the necklace full of grandma's ashes" I wanted to vomit.

Anonymous said...

How about mixing the ashes with Play-Doh, for the kiddies?

Anonymous said...

How about making leather pouches from their skin and then putting rocks inside them?

Anonymous said...

It is disrespectful no matter the organic chemical equation explanation.

Anonymous said...

I'm a mess without my little china girl...

tbunni said...

As much coffee as my husband drinks, at least I'd know he was spending a quality time with me.

But a broken mug or plate would give new meaning to "chip off the old block"...

C said...

skeptic: how do you know it is really them and not just some $2 generic mug?

Unknown said...

Gives a whole new meaning to, "Let's eat, Grandma!"

 
Locations of visitors to this page